about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
