hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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