so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize