thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
third nipple confirmed
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
