Nicole vs. Life
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
