Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize