You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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