Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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