did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
