no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
