Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
