make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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