Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize