He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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