My nipple is on Facebook.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
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