Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
