Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
