My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
my poor anus
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
