i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize
