Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
