we're blogging at a bar
The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
