i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
