She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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