They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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