So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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