I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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