What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Barsexuality is the new black.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
