good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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