This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
