What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
