haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Someone signed my nipple.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
