I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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