You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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