so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
