Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
