How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
