coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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