apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
