do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
