Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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