Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
