You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
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