cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
