I seem to have left my pride at pride
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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