No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize