I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
i've created a new STD.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
