Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
