Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
