no, he came in my armpit
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
my poor anus
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Randomize