Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
